Anniversary

OK, but why was I walking around today like it was no big deal. Why wasn't I at least angry, or sadder? Why did I feel kinda normal? Maybe I was still in some kind of mental shock, unable to deal with the new reality. Perhaps that's why I kinda checked out a couple of times yesterday. Arrrr, better keep a weather eye out matee. Hmmm, maybe a kinda PTSD? Ok enough of that, now I'm just going in circles.

What am I gonna do now? What's the plan? What outcome did I want?

Divorce for sure, she had showed me that not only could she break our trust, but that she could lie and hide it for years. There was no coming back from that. Oooh, that got a reaction, a little anger perhaps?

What about Steve, what was I gonna do about him. He had moved in and taken what was supposed to be mine exclusively. It wasn't ownership I was thinking about, it was partnership and fidelity. He'd broken those with his big cock. He would have to pay some price; my man card at least demanded that. Ok, now a bit more of that anger stuff. Good Luke, let the anger flow.

Steve would pay alright. I would need to talk to their boss, Mr. Adams, and let him know what a lowlife scum he was. And his wife, yup Claire would have to be informed. She deserved to have all the sordid details. She would probably divorce Steve, take him for everything he had, and he'd end up in a cardboard box under the freeway. What a wonderful thought.

Who else needed to be informed? My in-laws, they'd surely take Marie's side. Or at least give her support, you don't turn your back on your kids, no matter what they do.

John, oh man. He needed to know what a sneak Sandra, his wife, was. She helped Marie get away with her affair; there was no telling what else she was hiding from the poor guy. Yup, John needed to be told.

My kids, Sean and Katy. That was going to be hard. I loved those two, they were my world. They were all I had now. But they were adults, mid-twenties was an adult. After all they had good jobs, their own apartments. They had their own lives. They needed to see that their old man was not gonna take this kind of shit from anyone. Marie had done me wrong; she needed to pay the price. Not a positive example for the kids, but certainly an important one.

My mother, I would have to be careful with her. I didn't want to shock her too much.

Hmmmm, here I was caring about everybody else, what about me. What did I need to move forward out of this mess? A long fucking vacation, that's what. I needed to go someplace where I could marinate in the sun and not have a care for a while.

Jeremy! A work colleague had always said I was welcome to vacation with him in Puerto Escondido. Jeremy had bought a house down there years ago and spent half the year in the sunny clime. That's just the ticket.

Ok, Ok. That seemed to cover everything, but something seemed missing. What could it be, it was nagging at me. But I'd been sitting on this park bench long enough, time to take another loop around the park and then see about dinner. Yup, all this planning had worked up an appetite.

One Year Ago: Wednesday

Ow, my head. What a headache. The sun was up and altogether too bright. Had I drank too much at dinner? Afterwards? No I don't think so. I'm pretty sure I just had the one glass of wine with my steak (porter house this time) and a single cocktail in the lounge. Hoo boy, I better watch myself today. Right now what I needed was a shower, breakfast and some Tylenol.

I was moving pretty gingerly as I made my way into the restaurant, I grabbed the first open booth and checked my phone while I was waiting to be noticed. Again nothing from Marie, she must be too busy with Steve to check in on her hubby. No matter, I sent her another innocuous message. It's a good thing I had a great team that could cover for me while I dealt with my personal problems.

"What can I get you hon?"

"Can you please make me some cheesy scrambled eggs, dark toast with butter, and a big mug of coffee. Oh, and some hash browns, I like 'em crispy, or well done. Thanks."

Ah, coffee. I remember walking around yesterday, but some things are kinda hazy. I was getting the distinct impression I wasn't firing on all cylinders. I know I had thought about feeling kinda numb after Monday morning, but here it was Wednesday and I definitely felt different than yesterday. More all there, but enough back to my old self that I could discern that I had been in a kind of fog Monday nite and probably all day Tuesday.

Wow, I really had been more affected than I realized. Which meant I was on the mend from whatever state I had been in. But to my earlier point, I still wasn't all back to normal. That's good, I was being more honest with myself, more in tune with how I was really feeling.

What I needed now were those cheesy eggs and another cup of coffee. The world would certainly be much clearer with a full belly and some caffeine...

"Good morning miss."

"Mr. Carson, how are you feeling today? How can I be of assistance?"

"Two things please. Is Nurse Simmons in? I'd like her to take my blood pressure again. I think I might not be fully recovered from my horrible Monday. And I'd like you to check my charges from last night. I seem to have forgotten some details."

"Certainly sir. Let me page Nurse Simmons and while we're waiting I can call up your charges from yesterday evening. Here we go, dinner in the Pepper Mill at 8pm, then a charge in the Lounge."

"Can you tell how many glasses of wine I had with dinner, and how many drinks in the lounge?"

"Yes, just let me click on the total and the details will pop up. Dinner last night - a steak, dessert, and a glass of red wine."

"Just one glass?"

"Yes, that's correct sir. And in the lounge it appears you just ordered a highball and that's all. You did tip the bartender generously."

"Thank you very much for checking. Ah, I see Nurse Simmons coming this way."...

Back out in the street the sun didn't seem quite so terrifying. I really liked the Waterfront Walkway but today I thought I'd take in the Aquarium. Maybe do a tour to get my mind off my troubles.

Nurse Simmons said my blood pressure was still a bit high, she thought I still had the bug that had laid me low on Monday. I didn't fill her on any of the details of that. But she did give me two little packs of Tylenol. Then why did I wake up with a hangover from just two drinks?

I decided to walk to the Aquarium; it wasn't that far. Besides it would give me a chance to think some more; maybe solidify my plans. First of all, why was I feeling sick? Sensitivity to alcohol, headache, missing time. It sure sounded like I was going nuts, or had the flu. Or I had had my heart ripped out of my chest; oh Marie what have you done!?

I needed to get back to the concrete, make real plans instead of navel gazing. Back to the real deal.

OK, I needed to get the divorce paperwork started. Right, needed to call Grant, my lawyer. He'd want financials, and other data; but at least he could get the ball rolling. Great, call Grant soonest.

I had thought yesterday about informing everybody about the divorce. I really didn't want to have to explain, or justify why I was dumping Marie. And I certainly didn't want to come out as the bad guy; I had done nothing wrong. Full disclosure! Yup that's the ticket. Hey, I can get Charter to make additional copies of the report. Put those in nice binders, one for each conversation. That way nobody could spin the situation into anything other than what it was.

Hmmm, a special binder for Mr. Adams! Get the Charter people to highlight the transcripts everywhere Steve or Marie mentioned something work related. That would certainly contribute to the revenge angle; they were probably doing more that taking long lunches. The cheaters!

I could ask Charter to do the same for John's binder. He was such a good guy. Yes, having all the mentions of Sandra highlighted would help him decide what to do about her. Man, I sure hope she's not stepping out on him too.

Alright, good so far; Lawyer and binders. Hah, Binders! Everybody gets a binder!

Jeremy! Right, I'm gonna want to get out of Dodge for a while and recharge, change the condition of my condition. I wonder if he's down in Oaxaca right now. Another agenda item, call Jeremy.

What else? I gotta have a plan for the next month - until Chicago. I can do all those conversations while our love birds are in Chicago. Ooh, just like in the Literotica stories, I can move out. Put all my things in storage and fly the coop. Let Grant deal with the details and fallout while I'm soaking up the sun.

Moving out, that's going to take some coordination. I have a garage full of tools and stuff. All that will need to go into storage while I'm away. Then there's all my books and electronic gear. Right, I need a moving company to come during Chicago week. Another phone call, hopefully I can find a company that can take care of all that for me when I want it done.

I'm going to need a cover story from now until then. I gotta be honest with myself; I'm not my usual jaunty Gary. I'll have to come up with something to explain my odd behavior. I'll just go with a thorny client problem with everybody.

Oh, there's the aquarium already. That was a shorter walk than I thought. I'll go in and see if they have any guided tours, that should take my mind off things, and kill some time too...

Where did the day go? I'm so glad I took a different route back to the hotel. I'd forgotten about the Art Museum just around the corner. That was certainly a lot of fun. And fortified with that great hot dog from the cart out front of the Aquarium I was able to view most of the art exhibits.

But now to dinner, what are we in the mood for? Salmon and scalloped potatoes. And just sparkling water, I'm swearing off booze for a while. I might still be in the thrall of my mental irregularities.

I brought my pad with me and put in some action items while I was waiting.

1. Divorce paperwork: Gary
2. Binders: Charter
3. Moving: yellow pages
4. Jeremy: Puerto Escondido
5. Meetings with everybody

Just then a couple of little kids ran by my table, must be a family in here besides us road warriors. The little girl yelled, "I'm gonna get you, wait 'till I catch you!"

CLICK. That was it, the thing that had been nagging at the back of my mind. The missing piece - punishment! Divorcing Marie wasn't enough, so she could stay in the house and fuck her boyfriend all she wanted? Nope. Or take half our stuff and move into a singles apartment? Nope. I couldn't let her come out of this unscathed. She needed to pay for the crimes she'd committed against me. But what punishment fit the crime, what price could she pay that came close to ripping my heart out and stomping it to the ground? Now I was cooking; revenge, payback, atonement. Where exactly on the scorched earth vs. forgiveness spectrum was my thinking? Now there's something to ponder.

Best to sleep on that, I was still here for a couple more days. Plenty of time to let the 'click' to be fully realized. So I added another item to my list.

1. PUNISHMENT!!!

One Year Ago, Thursday:

I woke up at my usual hour fairly refreshed. Laying off the booze had been a good plan. I felt like today was going to be even better than the first part of the week. Up and at 'em. Hah! I caught myself humming while I was shaving. I also noticed the guy in the mirror didn't quite look so haunted as before, were his eyes a bit clearer?

From the booth getting breakfast I could see that outside had dawned overcast and a bit windy. Good, that fits with my plans to hit the phone this morning and actually get moving on my list...

Back in my room I got out my legal pad out and my favorite mechanical pencil. I was ready for anything.

"Gary! I'm calling to get the ball rolling on divorcing Marie, let me fill you in"...

"Mr. Charter, I have some clerical work I need done. I'm gonna need several more copies of the report"...

"College Hunks Moving Junk, how May I help you?"

"I need to have a garage full of tools, clothes, and some miscellaneous items packed, moved, and stored all done on a particular day in a few weeks"...

"Jeremy! How the hell are you!? Listen are you down in Puerto Escondido right now. You are, great! Can I come for a visit?"...

I felt quite satisfied with myself by lunchtime. In fact I felt so good; I thought I'd reward all my hard phone work this morning with another of those juicy burgers, and some fries. Certainement!

I had gotten lucky and the fourth 'movers' I called could do as I wanted. I picked the Wednesday of 'Chicago week' as the move day. I figured Monday and Tuesday I would tackle all the in-person visits. Then I would have Thursday and Friday to 'get outta Dodge'.

Jeremy had told me previously that he's driven down to Oaxaca. He lives north of me so I reasoned that I could easily drive it too. I liked to drive, and my Jeep was set up for camping. Plus a few days on the road would be just the ticket to let the miles wash my troubles away.

So that left only Item #6 - Punishment. But what could I do, I didn't want to go to jail for breaking Steve's kneecaps. Although I rode that fantasy for a good ten minutes. Besides, I really wanted my revenge against Marie; she was the one who betrayed me. Steve just took advantage of what was being offered. She was the one that broke my trust. She was the one who torched our marriage. Say, now there's an idea.

"Gary! It's me again, I wanna run a couple of scenarios by you"...

The rest of my stay in Seattle was uneventful. Although I did write quite a bit on my legal pad. I had at least one page for each item. And then one page for each of the in-person visits. I didn't spend all my time in my room; I managed to take a ferry ride, and went back to the Art Museum. There's a lot to do down by the bay, if you have the time and inclination...

The month leading up to 'Chicago week' was pretty uneventful. Marie was doing her best to act normally, and she almost succeeded. She just couldn't hide her glee at spending a whole week with Steve. With my new calm demeanor it was no problem for me to act normal too. Although if I'm being honest with myself, I was saddened at the end of my marriage - 26 years! Oh, well. If my acting wasn't quite up to snuff, Marie's enthusiasm didn't let her see it.

So Sunday night she Uber'd to the airport. She claimed she didn't want to miss any of the early Monday sessions at the Conference. Yeah, right. That night I slept like a log. I love it when a plan comes together.

Chicago Week

Mr. Adams, CEO of Marie and Steve's company:

Monday morning I was at Marie's company offices, the first of the white binders under my arm.

"I'm Gary Carson, Marie Carson's husband. I need to see Mr. Adams on an urgent matter. Please let him know I'm in the lobby and must see him right away."

Ten minutes later Barbara, Mr. Adams admin was ushering me into his office.

"Gary, how the hell are you? What's all this about an urgent matter?" Mr. Adams was one of those larger than life men who had fought his way to the top. A good man nonetheless.

"Mr. Adams, I've come to have a difficult talk with you. And to bring you this binder. In it you will find evidence that Steve Saunders and my Marie have been having an affair for about three years."

"What the fuck! Gary that's a serious charge, I don't condone that kind of behavior between an employee and their boss. Especially somebody like Saunders, he and Marie work with some of our most sensitive clients."

"Mr. Adams, they are in Chicago right now carrying on their affair. They are supposed to be there for an industry conference, but instead they're spending most of their time in their suite acting like honeymooners. There's evidence in the binder to prove that too."

"Fuck, fuck, fuck. I was grooming that man, bringing him along. I thought he had his head on straight. This is not good; this is the last thing I need to bring to the Board's attention. We trusted him; fuck - fishing off the company pier! But man, you must be in hell finding out something like that." Mr. Adams went to his sideboard and poured a couple of fingers for each of us.

"Fuck! What am I going to do with this? Damn son, what are you gonna do?"

"That's why I'm here Mr. Adams."

"Son you better get used to calling me Chuck. I'm guessing we're going to be through a lot together you and me."

"Yes Mr., er Chuck. Here's what I see happening. First of all I'm bringing you this evidence. It was collected last month. The transcripts have been highlighted any time our two love birds talked about anything work related. Steve has been funding their affair through his expense account. And I think there are some clues in there that he might be doing some other things too. There's nothing concrete, but I think you want to do some forensics on his activities. He's made mention of Morrison a couple of times. But there's not enough in there for me to understand the reference."

"Fuck, this just keeps getting worse. BARBARA! BARBARA! Get in here please!" Barbara came hurrying into the office. "Get me the CFO, HR, and our GC in here on the double. No objections, they need to be in my office as fast as they can get here."

"Chuck, Marie is going to be served divorce papers on Saturday when she gets off the plane. Steve will be served too; I'm going after him for alienation of affection." Just then the three Exec's came in.

"OK everybody, take a seat. In case you haven't met, this is Gary - he's Marie Carson's husband. And he's just dropped the news that Marie and Steve Saunders have been having an affair for the last three years. Some of it bleeding over into business time. Barbara stay a minute."

"Barbara you know where every paperclip is, you know who farted down in R&D. Give - did you know Steve and Marie were in a relationship?"

Barbara looked around the room, "Nothing concrete. But there have been some rumors floating around since the Christmas party before last."

"Fuck, there goes our plausible deniability."

Jeff, the GC spoke up. "Um, shouldn't we be having this conversation in private? Especially not in front of Mr. Carson."

"You're right Jeff, Gary we should probably let you get on with your day."

"Chuck there are two more things I'd like to ask before I go. I know you'll do a thorough job of looking into Steve's activities. And quite frankly you should probably look at Marie too. She's been just as dishonest as him. I'm hoping you don't take any action before the weekend. You see I have some other things in motion and I don't want to show my hand before it's time."

Chuck looked around the room and got nods from his department heads.

"The last thing, and perhaps even more difficult is that I would like you to incentivize me for not suing your company. I think we can all agree that keeping this 'affair' under wraps would be the best way forward, your company can't afford this kind of bad publicity and loss of trust in two of your most senior people."

"Fuck, you got some balls on you son."

"Thank you Chuck. So further to that, I propose a check, with a single digit followed by six zero's be made out in my name. In return I will instruct my lawyer to sign a non-disclosure agreement on my behalf. His card is in the inner flap of the white binder."

"Fuck, I'm going to need another sip of this fire water. We'll discuss it after you've left. But in all honesty, I appreciate the way you're handling this. You've done us a favor." He shook my hand and ushered me out, closing the door behind me.

Claire Saunders, Steve's wife

I drove straight to Steve and Claire's house after leaving Mr. Carson and his team.