Giving Thanks for Lingerie

"I am. I came up with a plan for the day."

We jogged on for a while. Eventually, Erica asked in a slightly annoyed tone, "Which is?"

"To have a fun day with family."

I could almost hear Erica's teeth grinding. "Do you enjoy being intentionally vague?"

"With you, yes. I know you're so curious that you'll always ask me to tell you more."

"Okay. So what exactly will you do to have a fun day with family?"

"I'm not saying. It might not work out, and I don't want you to make fun of me if it doesn't."

Erica said almost petulantly, "I won't make fun of you."

"Yeah, right."

As kids, I was the bigger and stronger, and Erica had always retaliated to my bullying her by making fun of me.

Normally when I was with someone, I regularly tossed out conversation starters, but not this morning. I knew Erica was curious about our conversation last night, and I waited for her to ask me about it. Jogging gave me an excuse to wait.

Finally, Erica said, "Last night, you said that you couldn't think of any time that you and Hailey had made love after she had worn lingerie. But you said much earlier that sex with Hailey was the best you've ever had. And you said you bought Hailey lingerie regularly."

I smiled inwardly. "I did. I loved seeing Hailey wearing the lingerie I bought her. I'd always tell her how sexy and beautiful she looked whenever she modeled it for me. But those compliments wouldn't have been as effective if Hailey viewed them as me trying to get her into bed. So, by not having sex with her after she had worn lingerie, that actually encouraged her to wear lingerie more often."

"How often did she wear lingerie?"

I blew out a long breath, which turned to fog as soon as it left my mouth. "It depended. She rarely wore lingerie when we first started dating. In the stretch before we merged our finances, maybe two or three times a week. The number dropped after we merged our finances. How often do you wear lingerie?"

"What? Me?"

"Yes, you. You're the only one I'm jogging with."

"That's personal."

I looked at Erica and rolled my eyes. "Moments ago, you asked me a couple of questions about Hailey's lingerie-wearing habits, and it's too personal for you to discuss?"

"Why don't you act like a therapist?" said Erica sharply. Before I could answer, she added, "Behave. Why don't you behave like a therapist?"

"I do behave like a therapist. I'm a therapist. Ergo, concordantly, vis-à-vis, I behave like one."

"Will you stop bullshitting me and give me a real answer!" said Erica angrily.

I laughed. "Okay. A real answer. If you tell me how often you wear lingerie."

"Agreed."

"All right. When most people think of therapy, they think of a person talking about their mother to someone holding a pen and a pad of paper. That 'expert' would then diagnose them and treat them. And that was how therapy worked until a man named Carl Rogers came along. He developed client-centered therapy, a non-directive therapy allowing clients to deal with what they considered important at their own pace. This method involves removing obstacles so the client can move forward, freeing him or her for normal growth and development. By using non-directive techniques, Rogers assisted people in taking responsibility for themselves. Are you with me so far?"

"Sort of. Close enough."

"The times I've tried to come across as a traditional therapist, I always felt that people resisted me; that they thought I was going to make them do things they didn't want to do and get them to say things they'd prefer not to say. So I tried being me, and it's worked. Now when I start a new group, I tell them 'We are going to have a lot of fun together. We are going to do exercises similar to what they do in the best acting schools, and then we'll hopefully have some good discussions afterward.' I then get them to stand up and do warm-ups like in PE while I tell them a monologue I stole from the late-night shows. My clients are pretty loose by the time we start our first exercise. I get really high participation in my exercises because my clients think they'll have fun. And I think the exercises are fun because acting is fun. When we have our discussion afterward, I still get good participation because people like talking about something fun they just did. So I do act like a therapist because that's how I do therapy."

"So you purposely don't act like a therapist."

"Yuppers. I know a lot of therapists who act like a therapist 24-7. I find them creepy. I feel they're analyzing me the whole time we are talking, and, when we are done, they are going to go update my file. I very much try to not act that way, and sometimes I go overboard like when I first talked to you about Alexa."

"Had you heard of Intercourse before this week?"

"How often do you wear lingerie?"

Erica paused for a few moments and then said, "Not very often at all."

"How many pieces of lingerie do you have?"

"A couple of satin slips. They feel very nice, but they aren't practical."

"A satin slip is great when you are spending the evening cuddling on the couch while bingeing a show. And I was lying when I said that I hadn't heard of Intercourse. I've read it; great stuff. Feminism has made a huge positive impact on society. But slightly sexist jokes are still the most reliable way to make people laugh."

We jogged on in silence after that. Discussing Erica's lingerie habits had made her uncomfortable, but had given me a lot of pleasure. Yes, she had Aaron, and I had no one, but my relationship with Hailey had been very satisfying for most of its course, and I wanted my sister to envy that level of satisfaction.

"Okay," said Erica. "How was sex with Hailey so great if her wearing lingerie was so important to you, but you didn't have sex after she wore lingerie?"

"I think that's kind of obvious. We had great sex before she put on the lingerie."

We jogged on some more. I knew Erica was furiously churning over my last bit of information and would eventually break down and ask me for more.

"You'd have sex, and she'd put on lingerie afterward?"

I chuckled silently. I decided I had stretched this out long enough. "Let me guess. When you and Aaron reach the end of the day and are getting into bed, you start the dance about whether you'll have sex or not, right? Or Aaron might tap your shoulder while you're both in bed and ask for some fun?"

"Yeah. Mostly."

"That was what Jerri and I did." I had lived with Jerri during my senior year of college. "Hailey never wanted to have sex at the end of the day. She was tired, and she wouldn't have the energy to enjoy it. Asking her for sex once we went to bed annoyed her." I let Erica process that for a bit. "On the other hand, Hailey was great in bed earlier in the day when she felt fresh and energetic. So on Saturdays, we'd do something fun and physical like going for a hike or walking around a craft fair, and then we'd go home and make love. Later on, Hailey would put on some lingerie and a short, clingy dress. I'd tell her how sexy and beautiful she looked before and after she put on the dress, and we'd go out for the evening. At the end of the evening, we'd come home, change into night clothes, go to bed, and go to sleep."

"So seeing Hailey in lingerie or a short, clingy dress didn't make you want to have sex with her?" I felt like Erica was trying to find something wrong with what I had described.

"Oh, it did. But I quickly learned to postpone acting on that feeling until the next day. Let those juices simmer, as it were. During the week, I'd cook a very nice dinner for her on Tuesday and Thursday nights, we'd drink quite a bit of wine during dinner, and once the dishes were put into the dishwasher, I'd hug her and nibble on her neck. She'd be in the mood, and most of the time, we'd only make it as far as the couch. After we were done, we'd get all cuddly while we watched TV. I found it much easier to be cuddly and lovey-dovey after having sex and with no agenda of trying to persuade her to have sex again."

"So you had sex three times a week?"

I smiled. "Four." I had loved having sex that often every week. "Before lunch on Saturday and Sunday; after dinner on Tuesday and Thursday. Hailey liked having sex scheduled and was almost always up for sex at the scheduled time."

"So there was no spontaneity?"

"None." I pointed at a house. "That's an interesting paint job." I felt like I had done enough bragging to my sister about my sex life with Hailey, so I kept the conversation on more mundane things for the rest of the jog.

As we jogged, I reviewed in my mind what I would say to Alexa when we got back to my parents' house. In the past, I had always ignored Alexa at these family gatherings, much to my parents' displeasure. She had given me decorating advice that was intriguing but that I couldn't quite picture. I'd ask her to go shopping with me for things for my apartment. Now that I had actually talked with her, I was interested in learning more about her. If we got along well enough, I might spend some time just talking with her.

* * * *

Around two, I announced, "Hey, everyone! We're back," as Alexa and I entered my parents' house. We had left the house before nine. "We had a good time. I bought a lot of stuff at Hobby Lobby for my apartment. I eventually took Alexa to La Madeleine for lunch. So what has everyone been up to while we were gone?"

Aunt Rose said, "We weren't expecting you to be gone that long."

"Hobby Lobby was packed. It was hard to move around. We wanted to look at a lot of different things, and it was hard to do because people kept getting in our way. And since Alexa gave me so much help in picking out stuff for decorating my apartment, I felt that taking her to La Madeleine was an appropriate thank you. They were packed too."

I looked at Alexa, and she seemed content to not add anything more. All the parents seemed mildly unhappy. Erica seemed very unhappy. Alexa wandered off to the living room; I assumed to read her book. I headed to the kitchen to get some water. "What did you have for lunch? More turkey salad sandwiches?"

I didn't get much of a conversation from people. Finally, Mom asked in a perplexed voice, "You and Alexa had a good time together?"

"Yeah! Very good time."

"But you've never done anything with her before. You don't have much in common."

"She's seven years younger than me!" I said with a little heat. "Of course, I didn't have much in common with her when we were kids. That was why I never played with her despite you nagging me to do so." I calmed down. "We're both adults now, and she had lots and lots of good ideas about decorating. You should ask her for some advice on redecorating your house." I chugged the bottle of water. "I've got the leaves in the backyard mostly bagged. Time to start working on the front."

After I had raked leaves for ten minutes, Erica came out and joined me. "Everyone was concerned about you and Alexa."

"Why? We weren't going anywhere dangerous."

"It's just...You had talked about dating for fun and brushing up on your social skills. You had told me that you thought Alexa needed someone to fuck her senseless. Then you drove off with Alexa right after breakfast and were gone half the day. And when you get back, you're all vague about what you did, and Alexa doesn't say a word."

"Did Alexa look unhappy when we got home? Did she have any negative body language?" I knew she had been smiling and had had an air of happiness when we got back.

"No, but..."

I waited. When Erica didn't say more, I asked, "Are you asking me did I fuck Alexa senseless?" I was enjoying that I had managed to do something that had shocked and worried the whole family. "No. No such luck. But we did have a good time together. And I did brush up on my social skills. I knew when I asked her to go with me to Hobby Lobby that it'd be a challenge to keep our conversation going, but I managed to do so."

"Did you try to fuck Alexa senseless?"

"What? No. I should have been clearer when I said that. I think that Alexa would benefit greatly from someone who thinks she is wonderful and special to fuck her senseless. That's not me. I think all she wanted was to have a fun conversation with me, and we did."

"Going to Hobby Lobby and having lunch shouldn't have taken that long."

"After we shopped at Hobby Lobby, we went to a park and sat on a bench for a while. It was a nice day to do that. Lots of people were out and about. Quite a few families. After that, we went to La Madeleine and had lunch. And then we came back here."

"What did you talk about for that long?"

"Stuff." Erica gave me a disgusted look. "Lots of stuff. Probably the thing we discussed the most is stories from my being a dungeon master. I suspected she wouldn't want to talk about herself, and she didn't. Occasionally I'd ask her a question about herself, but nothing too invasive."

"Such as?"

"If she could have any pet she wanted in her apartment, what would she have?"

"And what would she have?"

"You ask her!" When Erica frowned, I added, "You're talking to someone who has had it pounded into their head that you always respect the privacy of those you talk to."

"So you talked and talked, you bought her lunch, and then you came home."

"Yeah." I crooked my head. "I was really grateful for her helping me buy stuff to decorate my apartment. It's been depressing that my place has looked like I'm just passing through, but the idea of decorating it by myself has made me feel very lonely. It was great having a woman help me make the decisions on how to decorate. And hopefully, by next weekend, my apartment will, for not a lot of money, look like a home. So when we were done shopping at Hobby Lobby, I didn't want to take her back to Mom and Dad's and have her go right back to her book. Instead, I took her to the park for a while and then bought her lunch at La Madeleine."

Erica didn't seem convinced. Or whatever. It wasn't any of her business what Alexa and I had done. Did Erica think I was so desperate for sex that I'd try to seduce my much-younger cousin?

I said, "If you don't like me spending time with Alexa, you could go shopping with her tomorrow morning."

"Are you thinking of going shopping with her again?" Erica asked me suspiciously.

"Yes. I had a good time with her this morning, so why not do it again? But I'll defer to you if you want to spend the morning with her."

Erica thought and frowned. "Neither of us would enjoy going shopping together. I don't have your skill at making small talk. There'd be lots of uncomfortable silences. Will you and William go somewhere tomorrow morning?"

"I'm not going anywhere with William. I was fine with doing most of the heavy lifting of keeping the conversation going with Alexa. With William, he'd be always bringing the conversation back to football, and that's something I find very unappealing." I was doubtful I could convince William to leave the TV. "Back to you and Alexa. I can see you two having lots of uncomfortable silences because neither of you wants to talk about yourselves."

"What? Are you saying I don't want to talk about myself?"

"Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying."

"I'm fine about talking about myself."

"You asked me several questions about my and Hailey's sex life, and you didn't reciprocate by telling me anything personal about you and Aaron. And talking about Hailey should be painful for me because I'm still not over her and I've not found anyone new. But I'm far more comfortable talking about Hailey than you appear to be talking about your life with Aaron."

Before Erica could respond, we heard the front door open, and both of us turned to it.

Mom said, "Come inside, please. We are about to order dinner and need you to say what you want."

* * * *

Mom was ordering pizza and wanted us to work with our other family members on what toppings to order. William and I quickly agreed on a pizza with all the meats. Dad and Uncle Grant said they'd like a slice. Erica and Alexa agreed to vegetarian pizza. I volunteered William to go with me to pick up the pizzas. On the drive there and back, sure enough, it was all football, all the time.

When we got back, everyone got their slices, and we once again split up into the Parents Table and the Kids Table. When Erica sat down, she said to Alexa, "It sounds like you know a lot about decorating."

Alexa looked down at her plate, slightly embarrassed. "I don't know if I know a lot, but I know more than Matt."

"That's not hard," I added.

"Do you watch HGTV?" asked Erica.

"Not really. The budgets for remodeling on those shows are ridiculous. I'll never have hundreds of thousands of dollars to remodel a home."

Erica persisted. "Do you watch decorating shows other places?"

"I do." Alexa had the look on her face that she had been caught. "I've found some non-HGTV decorating shows that have much smaller budgets. I enjoy watching them." She smiled. "They are my guilty pleasure."

"That seems pretty minor for a guilty pleasure," said Erica reassuringly. "Aaron and I have about a dozen fish. What pet would you have if you could have any pet?"

Alexa flashed a look at me before answering Erica. "A cat."

"I'd have a dog," said William.

"A dog?" I asked. "What kind of dog?"

"What do you mean?" asked William gingerly, like he was worried that I would make fun of him.

"A German Shepard? A poodle? What size of dog would you like?"

"Definitely not a poodle. Probably not as big as a German Shepard. Something in between."

"Like a Border Collie?" asked Erica.

"What's that?" replied William.

"A breed of dog," said Alexa in an are-you-that-stupid? tone.

I jumped on William finally talking about something besides football. "Your parents never had a dog. What has been your experience with dogs?"

"Some of my friends had dogs." With a little encouragement from me, he told stories about him having fun with dogs.

Alexa said, "I've told you before, you should start a business where you take care of dogs."

William snorted. "My complex won't let me have a dog. How could I start a business taking care of dogs when I don't own one?"

"You could start a dog walking business," I offered. William shrugged dismissively. "Hey! Don't write off side gigs in this economy. I would not be able to afford my car or my apartment if I didn't dungeon master for money."

"How would I get customers for such a business?"

I told everyone about how I got started earning money as a dungeon master. "The big thing was accepting that I could demand people pay me money to DM. I viewed it for too long as something I should only do for the fun, and it'd be wrong to charge money for doing it." I then went into how I find new customers and followed that with how I manage the finances of my business. As I talked, I saw the parents occasionally checking on us. They seemed surprised that the four of us were having a long conversation together.

"You know," said William, "I've never played Dungeons and Dragons. It's never appealed to me. But now I'm curious. Could we do a D&D game tonight?"

"I'd be up for that," said Alexa brightly.

I turned to Erica, who said, "What? Would you want me to play?"

"You've played before. It'd be good to have a veteran player."

I had the impression that Erica didn't want to do it but didn't want to let her family down. "Okay. I'll play."

The rest of the evening, I researched what campaign to run and then helped William, Alexa, and Erica create their characters. William rolled up a Ranger and Alexa a Cleric. As I was working with Alexa, I got a hard-on. Alexa wasn't my type at all, but she was definitely enjoying attention from me, and I hadn't jacked off since I got here.

When I was done with Alexa, I helped Erica roll up a Chaotic Neutral Half-Elf Thief. The whole time, I thought about how my sister had reacted to my spending so much time with Alexa. Was she jealous? I didn't think she was, but why else would it have bothered her so much?