You Don't Have To Be Coy, Roy

"There was a lot of soul searching before I made the decision, Major. Look into it if you have time."

"All right. The easiest way would be to hack her phone if you can get it to me. We'll probably subcontract most of this because she knows me and a lot of staff from your parties. Remember, she interviewed most of us when they did that murder mystery. You got a time frame?"

"A week or two should do it. You don't know how much I hope you tell me I told you so."

He sighed. "I'll start tomorrow. When can I get access to her phone?"

I had to think about it. The only time it wasn't on her person was when she was charging it. "Can you send a guy around after midnight? It will probably be the only time I can access it."

"Tomorrow night. He can do it from his van, it'll be a lot quicker that way."

Feeling like an asshole, I made sure we had a pretty spirited session that night. She snuggled to me afterwards and was asleep instantly. I waited an hour until she turned over, slipped out of bed, eased her phone off the charger and went out the patio door. It kind of freaked me out he was sitting there in the shadows.

He didn't even go back to the van, hooking the phone up to his laptop and working off the patio table. Almost immediately he said "Shit!" softly.

"What?"

"She's got an anti-hack encryption installed. Pretty sophisticated stuff. Can you get me her laptop?"

I found myself creeping softly back into the house to retrieve it. He took it to the van, hooked a couple of cables to it and worked like crazy before sitting back and sighing. "Got it. I caught it and reprogrammed it so it will never show up. I need your phone."

I handed it to him and he did a few things before handing it back. "You got a tracker app and a remote viewing program."

"What does that mean exactly?"

"It means you need another phone. Someone had cloned yours and everything you text, everything you say, every business transaction you make over your phone is reported to someone else."

Damn! This could be really bad. I ran most of my businesses over the phone. "Don't touch yours and keep anything confidential to a minimum. Use it just enough to not get made. I'll have you one up and running at the office tomorrow afternoon that will be as bulletproof as I can make it. By then, I should be able to tell who's getting your information."

"What do I do now?"

He shrugged. "Put everything back like you got it and go back to bed. Try to get some sleep. If you can, don't vary your routine. If she wants to cuddle, cuddle. If she wants to play, play. If she ignores you don't get antagonistic. Just roll with it. Remember, we don't know what we're dealing with here. She might be into something shady but might still be faithful to you. We need to find the players and figure out what the game is. If I can't be done tomorrow, I will be by the next day. Don't call us. We'll call you. You're still part owner and it won't be unusual. We can say we need you to come down to look at some spreadsheets and kick around an idea about branching out.

Surprisingly, I slept like a baby. I didn't succeed in business by hesitating. If I found a problem in something, I was investing in I faced it head on. I was deeply saddened to think the most important investment in my life was about to be proven worthless.

They called two days Later. Jimi heard me answer the phone and asked what I was talking about. "The Major wants me to come by and talk about branching out.

She smirked. "Let me guess, he's found a new way of peeking in windows to get the goods."

I grinned and watched her squirm at my reply. "Nobody does that much anymore unless the client wants live pictures. Pretty much everything now is done by computer and social media. Most agencies worth a damn have one or two geeks working for them who can overcome security codes and get past firewalls faster than a squirrel can crack a pecan. No, the Major doesn't need help in that area. He wants me to consider letting him add a personal security division. You know, bodyguards, escorts when a man or a woman doesn't feel safe in public, extra club security if a lot of famous names are present, that sort of thing. It could be very profitable. They've got their pitch together and want to present it. Knowing Jason, there'll probably be a PowerPoint presentation. Wanna come?"

She wrinkled her nose. "No. It sounds boring as hell. Besides, I have a guild meeting. I'll probably be late."

I surprised her with my answer. "Aren't you always lately? I won't wait up."

"What?"

I was out the door before she could go further.

*****

The Major met me at the door and he wasn't smiling. Jason had his headphones on and when he looked up and saw me, he handed me a pair.

The first thing I heard was Jimi. "No fun and games tonight boys. Roy is a little ticked about the time I'm spending here. I can only justify so much."

A male voice, later identified as Jack, started whining. "Damn it! I was looking for a little fun tonight."

I still remembered Philip's voice as he spoke. "Calm down Jack. We can wait. We're almost in. When we get there, we all disappear to the Caymans for a very enjoyable life."

Jimi giggled. "At least you two can console each other. I'm horny as well, and I intend to rock Roy's world tonight. In fact, I'm going to ramp it up a bit. Keep him calm and relaxed. Besides, he's a pretty good lover and I need to get all that I can."

Jack wanted to whine but she cut him off. "Get over yourself Jack. Go home and fuck Philip."

Philip laughed. "He was so horned up knowing we were going to see you today he did that before the play. Come on, honey, give Jimi a kiss and when we get home, I'll fuck you. Better yet you can blow me while I ream your cunt with Big Ben."

Jimi giggled. "You lucky boy. He used it on me the other night and it was almost more than I could take. You'll be walking funny tomorrow."

Jason switched off the headphones. "How..."

"I cloned her phone and have total access. Every time she speaks, live or on the phone, it's recorded." He grimaced. "She talks a lot. I had to put a filter on it so it only activates after key words. Then she revealed some of their plans and I had to remove it. Now we have to listen to every word. My ears hurt. I'll let the Major take over."

I knew the man wouldn't sugar coat it and I was right. "She's fucking both those assholes, at least one more guy and two women. We have names and bios on all of them but the last male lover, and we'll have that by tomorrow."

I was rocked. "How....Why....I thought she loved me."

"She did. I think she still does just a little. From what I heard she doesn't want to ruin you, but she does want all your ready cash, including the prenup trust fund you established."

Well then. There was 300 grand in it now, plus about forty thousand in our checking account. My investment capital was a little over 600,000, so if she got it all it came up just shy of a million. A million was a lot of money, but in the grand scheme of things but not something that would last her a lifetime. I said as much to the Major.

"It seems you've rubbed off on her. She wants to invest the money in a doughnut franchise. She intercepted a call from the owner wanting you to invest and checked him out. She even went to see him in her capacity as an ad executive and your wife. She and her lovers seem to think the place could be a gold mine."

"She's throwing our life away for donuts? Really? Why?"

Jason rejoined the conversation. "Her lovers seemed to have convinced her that you're having affairs."

"With who?"

"With Celeste Richards, Jodie Hathaway, and Amy Rogers. They even say you all have sex together."

I sighed. "Damn, I'm a busy little beaver. I've never slept with Celeste and I haven't talked to her except on the phone in five weeks. Jodie is a hardcore lesbian who has no use for a man, sexually, and Amy's a transvestite and the accountant for the club I invested in. And before you ask, I don't swing that way."

"What do I do now?"

The Major smiled, a smile that probably struck terror into anyone he was interrogating. "Now we get irrefutable truth. The conversations we've obtained are illegal and can never be used. What we can use them for is to track their movements and be there when they get together. Then we get pictures and audio and your prenup is upheld. I don't think it'll take us long. You need to go on a trip for a couple of days real soon. We also need to wire your house with audio and video recorders. I don't think they're dumb enough to do it in your house, but you never know."

"Tomorrow is Thursday. You can do it while she's at work. I'll tell her tonight that I have to be out of town Friday and may not get back until Sunday. She's already got the motive, this will just give her the opportunity."

*****

I went home. What else was I gonna do? Luckily, I was there long enough to take a sleep aid I used occasionally when I traveled and was almost out of it when she got home. Jimi slid into bed naked and rubbed up against me but gave up pretty quickly when I didn't respond. I laid there wondering how many more nights we would sleep together as husband and wife.

I told her that I'd be leaving about noon to travel to Cleveland.

"What the hell is in Cleveland?"

"A security service that's going out of business due to poor management. The Major is going with me to evaluate the personnel. We should get through the interviews by tomorrow, but it may take until Sunday."

There was a little resentment in her voice. "And you're just now telling me?

I shrugged. "I didn't know about it until last night. It came up in the meeting we had. It could be quite lucrative and it's just two days. I tell you what, let's make a plan to go on vacation week after next. Somewhere warm, sandy, and private. I've heard the Caymans are nice this time of year and we've never been there. I've had the feeling we're slipping away from each other lately and I want to make sure you know how much I love you."

She flinched at the Caymans reference but recovered quickly. Jimi either had developed far more as an actress than I knew or she was genuinely moved. There were tears in her eyes when she kissed me. "I'd love that, honey. Let's go to that place in Belize, instead; maybe we can get the same bungalow, and just forget about the world for a few days."

Looking her in her eyes knowing it was never going to happen, and lying about it was one of the hardest things I'd ever had to do. After she left, I packed for Cleveland.

The Major, Jim, met me at the airport. He'd already planned on going pending my agreement, so I really was going to Cleveland. We arrived and got the business part done pretty early, putting three men and a woman on contract for a year. They didn't even have to move if they liked Cleveland; we could just email them details and they could show up at the appointed time and place.

When we got to the hotel Jim grinned. "Put your phone in the hotel room. You're not staying, but your phone will make it look like it if anyone checks. One of the new operatives is going to come by and get it about seven and take it with him while he dines at a very nice restaurant courtesy of us. Then he's going to walk around aimlessly downtown for an hour before returning it to your room. If she calls it will automatically forward to your new phone and she'll never know."

I shuddered; glad he was on my side. We ended up at a very nice resort in the country. When we went down to dine, I was beyond surprised to find Celeste, Jodie, Bob and Jan from the ad agency, Rick from the production company, and Chef Jean. Pretty much everyone I was in business with was at the table. I looked at the Major.

"We're all tied to you through business, but more importantly friendship. This is a show of solidarity, Roy. You invest in more than businesses, son. Your strong suit is your ability to invest in people. We're all with you whatever you deccide to do."

I was overcome. Up until the time I went into business I was a pretty private person without a lot of friends. I could look around this table and know that even if we were tied to each other through business, they were there as my friends.

Celeste had locked down on one hand and Jodie had the other. After a few minutes Jodie cleared her throat. "What do you need us to do?"

"Well, I'd sure appreciate some empty shoulders to cry on later. As for the rest, Jim has it covered." They all looked at him.

"They're planning a big after play party tomorrow, according to the chatter we're hearing. They don't know it, but there's going to be a slightly larger number in the audience than normal. We'll mingle with the patrons at the post production mingle. Anything they say there can be used because it's a public place and there's no right to privacy there. We already know where they're going and have that covered. We can't legally put anything in the suite they will be using, but there are lots of listening devices out there that can record through walls. Plus, if say a curtain malfunctions and doesn't close all the way and one happens to be in a position to see through it, then it's perfectly legal to look and film through the window. The whole group will be filmed continuously from the start of the play until the end of their evening. There is no doubt there will be enough for Roy to divorce for cause and uphold the prenup."

He sighed. "There's going to be collateral damage. The other man and both women are married, and not to any of the players. Tell us, Roy, how bad do you want it to be? Do you want her to go away quietly or do you want to burn her and her friends down? Either way works for me. Oh, and I booked an appointment with who I consider the best divorce lawyer in the state, Monday morning at ten. She emailed me a list of things you'll need to bring, most importantly the copy of the prenuptial."

I had to think about it. Most of my friends didn't know because they'd never had cause to see it, but when I'm wronged, I can turn into a vicious and vindictive bastard. One of my first investments folded because my partner fooled around with the money and bankrupted the business on purpose. I recovered and followed him for a while. Every time he was about to get something good going, something would happen that would put him farther behind. I did it for four years before I figured I had my pound of flesh.

I was still thinking when Jodie piped up. "Don't waffle, Roy. Be as decisive as you always have been. Put an end to it and get on with your life."

Jim added his input. "That's right. You don't have to be coy, Roy. Just get yourself free."

His statement broke the tension and everyone grinned. The drinking began. I went to bed as they were singing "Fifty Ways to Leave Your Lover" at the top of their lungs. Some even got the words right.

I was a bit hung over when the phone rang the next morning. It seems my new ring tone was "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover." I suspected Jason. Still, it made me grin.

"Hello."

Jimi seemed happy. "Good morning, Honey! How's Cleveland?"

"It's actually a lot better than I thought. It's clean, lots of parks and greenways, and the people are friendly. Still, it's Cleveland. I'll be glad to get home."

"I'll be glad when you're home too, honey."

"Well the good news is I got an early flight in the morning. I can probably be home by eight." That put a little kink in her plans. She was going to have to cut her fun short in able to be home when I arrived. I hoped she showered first.

She faltered a bit but recovered. "That's great. Remember my play is tonight. I might be a little grumpy in the morning."

The play started at 8 and would be over before 10. Even if you factored in the mingle, she could be home by 11:30 easily. I couldn't resist a little jab. "Well, don't get carried away. I know how pumped you are after a performance."

"I promise to be a good girl. I should be in bed by midnight."

Yes, but with who? That's what went through my head as I disconnected. Jim came in grinning. "Got her! She wasn't alone last night. While she was talking to you, she was in bed with a woman and the missing man from the group. Your bed. He's one of the Board members. A married Board member. The woman is married to a DA in another county. Depending how you want to play, this it could get very sticky very fast."

Well, there it was. I didn't have to wait. I decided on the spot to pull the trigger right after the play, during the mingle. "How much would it cost to get that lawyer to draw up divorce papers for adultery and get alienation of affections actions for all the players? I know they won't be legal, but they will declare intent."

He looked startled. "Jesus! Once you make a decision you don't fuck around. Pun intended. It'll cost you some coins, but I can get it done."

"Move on it while I tell the group my plans." I called Celeste and Jodie and met them for breakfast. Jodie seemed a little shocked, but Celeste just smiled. "Poor Jimi. All this time and she still doesn't know who she was married to. This will destroy all of them and probably the guild. I doubt they can come back from a second scandal."

"After the chips fall, I'll help them get started up again, but I'll make damn sure they know it's the last time."

Most of us flew home together and by the time we landed they had their own plan. All were going to be there for moral support. Jim was bringing in a few of the new bodyguards to keep just to keep it as civil as possible.

I hung out at the agency, listening to the phone chatter. Jimi seemed to be having last minute doubts. "I think I'll skip tonight. Roy's coming home early and I can't afford to raise his suspicions. We're too close to the end to screw up now."

That led to a flurry of calls between the conspirators. Most wanted her to come. The DA's wife urged her not to. "You're showing good sense girl. No need to screw up our playtimes. We'll have plenty of times later." Then she giggled. "Besides, it'll be more for me and Janice. Break a leg tonight."

None of the group were aware of her plans except Philip and Jack. Still going to burn them all. You play, you pay.

Jason stopped by, grinning. "Found you, hacker. It seems your pal Philip has a degree in Computer Science and works for an IT company. When it comes out what he did he'll probably be unemployed. Wanna have some fun?"

Jason spent an hour cross-hacking all of Philip's accounts. He even put the conversation about he and Jack being lovers, carefully editing out any reference to Jimi, on his Facebook page, declaring his love for Jack could not be denied and that they would be soulmates forever. It also seems he wasn't as good as he thought, because Jason followed his electronic trail and recovered every dime they had taken so far.

"He's gonna shit when this hits. I'd love to see his face."

I just smiled. "Come to the play. You can watch his face when I tell him I got all my money back."

*****

"Showtime," in more ways than one, I thought as I sat in the van that night. We were waiting until the very last minute to enter, waiting for the lights to go down and the curtain was up.

I was a little surprised at my 'date' for the night. It was Anne, the ex-wife of Philip. I didn't recognize her and she had to remind me who she was. She was fifty pounds lighter and her hair was now blond and flowed halfway down her back. It seems while she was married to the asshole she was at the end of her career as an MMA fighter. Her fighting name was Catherine the Great because of her size. She fought in heavyweight class and though she was never champion, she made a good bit of money before she retired. Unfortunately, Philip siphoned a lot of it off before she discovered it. It was right after the confrontation and she decided if he could cheat in marriage maybe it would be a good idea to see if he was up to anything else. She caught him just in time to preserve a little over half of her assets. It weas the main reason she didn't have to pay him alimony. Seems he'd taken his half of the assets early.