by scouries
I wanted to thank you for all of the work you utinto your stories. I have read most all of them and can't wait for more. Keep up the great work.
A great story with good detail and characterisation and the right balance between cool sex and plot development.
we look forward to some more stories now that the environment and the main characters hasve been developed so neatly
I have a habit of reading a story without wanting to know who the author is. Half way through, if I am enjoying it, I will then find out whose work I am reading.
Once again it is a piece by you. Well done. Really enjoyed it.
Amusing, interesting and of course erotic.
One of the best stories in Literotica!
I loved the development of the characters. I liked it didn't go right for the sex angle. I look forward to reading more of your stories.
Well Jim, you’ve done it again.-.giving us one of the better stories on LITEROTICA! You gave us some really hot coupling and did it a most tasteful way. Having spent some time in Thailand, I know just how sensuous a 'full body' massage can be.Pete.
Very well written and very sexy. I'm not sure if you needed her to strip at the end, but that might just be me. Now to check out your other stories. Thanks
I loved that so much. It's great to finally find a story that bigs up short brunette swimmers!
I found myself getting an ulcer reading about the arrogant , pompous,manager and owner of the gym. I know this site is fantasy, but when you let horny teenagers write about arrogant males who would be out of business in a real world I stop reading. Better luck in your next story.
the Ct. Yankee
Superb fiction. Thank you, scouries. This story is special because it gets better and better with every sentence. It starts small and finishes large. That's a winner every time.
I was going to give your story a zero, but decided to at least give you a 25. Why you might ask? Because in my opinion , your story is an unoriginal, imitative, peice of BS. Maybe next time you will do better.
I really enjoyed this story. Very erotic! I hope you will give us another installment maybe Jim will be dominated by his formerly virginal teenage girlfriend. Hopefully they will fully explore their fantasies together
Erotic, funny and pure 'scouries' - please do keep them coming (teehee!) and... yes, I remember my competitive swim days when healthy youths merged into many strokes and not all of them in the pool either! Swim or loose it...
Brialliantly stitched! The whole story is even surprisingly properly spelled, unlike most of the stories I have come across in Literotica, over the years!
Loved it. I even had a tear drop at the end and liked the strip down at the finish.
Alma 646
I must say...you've redeemed yourself from your other story I read ("Daddy" I Whispered). Very well written.
I especially liked the massages. slow and sensual with some teasing. If I had to pick something to improve, I guess it would be the action. It seemed a little short. could just be me though.
pretty good, but the sex was kind of light. could have told us about the blond didi more, and more details on the sexual encounters, or added more intensity sooner.
I abso-fucking-lutely love this story!!! It takes some time to get to the good stuff but then its all worth it! Beautiful work!!!
Not your best, a bit light in the sex department. I laughed hard about the scowling aussies, we'll see how our girls go against yours in the games, for a country with one tenth of your population we still manage to give you a run for your money in the pool ;)
Your humour and writing style makes your stories so readable. I am plucking up courage to submit my efforts and finding your submissions today are proving an inspiration.
I thought it was an excellent well written story. Better than most erotic stories I have read where they focus so much on the sex the rest of the details are hurried. Well done.
Every time I read this story, it becomes more and more sexy and fun! You can't help but find yourself reading it with a smile on your entire face! The next time I go to a gym, I think I will ask for the "Gold Triple X Membership" just to see if the receptionist recognises the reference to this story and "Blushes!"
....I have to say ,..i was all smiles reading this story...again i say,...you sure do have a talent that puts the reader right ..there.....very good reading...thank you again...
....I have to say ,..i was all smiles reading this story...again i say,...you sure do have a talent that puts the reader right ..there.....very good reading...thank you again...
All along while reading, I felt like I am the one who is seducing this young woman - with a constant hard-on!
A full scholarship swimmer at a large university needing a gym membership?? Right...because that makes sense. Large division I schools don't have their own weight rooms, trainers, and massage thereapists.
I loved the story, I loved the attitude and teasing, and I loved the sex.
only complaint (a small one) is that it is a tad unbelievable. for example the questionnaire; are you a virgin or what sexual orientation you are-Even virgins know that no one is allowed to ask that. The explanation he gave was well thought out, but still...
anyways that is only a small complaint. Most of this story is pretty solid.
to see the (usually) two commentators that pan your stories. Probably, it is only one person doing it twice as the comment seem to be similar in content. But I have liked all I've read, about a third of your submittals, thus far, and I think this one was one of the best. The sex was hot, I guess I really like the laying on of hands, and the story fun. I was off base, however, in anticipating a different ending. The win was somewhat expected, the strip job was definitely not, but I thought that she would get pregnant, not be able to compete and join him as a talented swimmer who, for some non-swimming related incident, would be unable to reach the pinnacle of their sport. Excellent work - I appreciate your providing us with erotic fiction - and, no, it doesn't have to seem real, just erotic, because that's what this is all about, and that's what you do - quite well. Thanks.
Jim, Another fine piece of work. Another gift to us all.
Thank You
I love how you seduced Mel slowly and your attention to erotic detail. Excellent, absolutely excellent.
Sure, of course, the application was a bit 'out there', but it added a bit of humor. That section could probably be tweaked for more believability but it wasn't too far out there.
I laughed out loud with this story! When he pulled down his pants for their race, I died laughing. The smartass comments on both sides, along with the chemistry were so entertaining. And I love seductions on the massage table. I didn't want the story to end. WRITE SOME MORE!!!
Mr. Scouries,
I have to admit, I read this storie 3 years ago and needed something to read tonight and again you made my night. every detail was not left out and wonderful description to the t. continue to utilize the words and descriptions, i will continue read your pictures you paint so well.
as an athlete, I can appreciate the intensity that goes into training; to feature that prominently in a well-crafted romance story is the epitome of erotica for me. Thank you for speaking to me on a deeper level.
Err no pressure but how wonderful it would be if you wrote another sterling erotic story in tandem with that event in London as was done for Beijing,
I chose the story because I was getting so hot watching the 2012 Olympics and I forgot to look at the name of the author.
After finishing it, I was just about to hit the top score when I noticed it was written by scouries, my all-time favorite Literotica author!
Stand on the top of the podium scouries!
Another fantastic finish!
I have read many of this author's stories and as usual, this was a good one!
Have been an avid reader on this site for nearly a year. As a really old guy I need the stimulation to get an orgasm, though I just enjoy the tales that are well written. You have a great writing talent--you are the best!
So glad that you specialize in incest and taboo as those tales more often give me the nudge I need. Keep up the good work. Am writing as Anonomous but some day I might e mail you as WP.
It was a beautiful story, well written to the point to make the reader,(me) hot and bothered (lol) besides touched by the tenderness and sweetness of new love. Keep writing like that, you engaged the reader and make them happy! ( I'm happy)
That was a funny, sexy, well written story¡ i wish you write more :,(
This one is my favourite of yours by far. I love how this ended but I just want more! Like maybe a part 2! But if you do, don't make it taboo like dad with daughter or something. As a writer and reader, I love how you established their relationship and as much as I love a good daddy daughter impregnation, doing that to this would just ruin everything. So of ever you decide on a part 2, just make it something like this: sweet, cute, hot, wet.
The hymen is like a ring, not a barrier. It doesn’t need to be broken, just stretched. You clearly know nothing about how virginity works.
Excellent Story. Loved every bit of it. well written and exciting. I wanted to give her the massage, and kiss all over her body.
This is your typical story line. Girl sees boy naked and transforms into wanton woman for him. LOL! You've had a couple or good stories I've enjoyed, the rest are just reruns.
Really good !! A few jaw droppers , pretty woman her man. I laughed at her comment at the end. 🤣😂 "Can we make some little swimmers now? "