Just Once - Once is All You Get End

"I can tell you have been living the hermit's life for a while."

I looked down at the front of my own swimsuit, then blushed from my toes to my head. There was not hiding the effect seeing Cici in that suit had on me. I quickly looked around and saw several beach towels laying on a cart, grabbed on and held it in front of myself.

"Um... Sorry. I.... Well.... You know..."

Cici laughed.

"Don't worry about it. I take it as a compliment. A mom with three kids will take just about any positive reaction about her looks."

I nodded dumbly, ever the articulate moron.

The kids were yelling for me to get into the pool, so I stepped to the edge and jumped in, doing a cannonball and splashing water everywhere. The three boys screamed with glee and when I came up, all three were on me like little octopi. I spent the next half our splashing, dunking and tossing them into the air and letting them splash back into the pool. I finally begged off, exhausted, and moved to the edge of the pool. Daniel was sitting at the table watching. Cici was sitting on the side of the pool, a smile on her face.

"They needed that."

I looked at her and saw the twinkle in her eyes.

"I'm sure that they get as much as they want from your Dad."

"He is wonderful, but he is granddad. They need another role model."

I looked at Daniel, who just sat smiling as he listened. We spent the rest of the afternoon around the pool. About 3 pm, Consuela corralled the three boys, announcing it was time for siesta. The boys dutifully climbed out of the pool and headed to their bedroom, with Consuela close behind. I watched.

"They are well-behaved. You have done an astonishing job with those three."

She nodded, but I heard a tremor in her voice when she spoke.

"The first few years have been the easiest. As they get older, it will get harder. A mother can only do so much."

I heard the unspoken words behind her statement. I climbed out of the pool and toweled off. Daniel came out of the kitchen with two more beers and handed me one. I heard Cici's voice behind me.

"Hey. Where's mine?"

Daniel chuckled and headed back to the kitchen and soon reappeared with a third opened beer. Cici, sat down at the table and turned the bottle up, draining half that bottle of beer in one go. I saw the resemblance to her dad.

It was Daniel who spoke again.

"I have to go check on the animals. Do you two want to come along?"

Cici looked at me.

"You up for some work?"

I looked puzzled.

"We have 6 horses, a few cows, goats, and a pig. The chickens need to be fed."

I shrugged.

"I don't know squat about livestock or chickens, but I'm game."

We all went to get dressed and met back up at the front door. Following Daniel out to the Range Rover, we climbed in, and he drove to the barn, almost a quarter mile from the house. I got my first introduction to farming when I was shown how to feed the horses. I thought it was relatively easy until Daniel handed me a rake and a grain scoop. The next few minutes were a real lesson in the kind of work it takes to keep horses, as I mucked out the stalls and hauled wheelbarrows of stale straw and horse dung to the pile out back. We then fed the other livestock, checked the water and looked over each animal to make sure all were healthy. The chickens required that we search for eggs. And then cleaned the coop, fed and watered. It was nearly dinner time when we got back to the house. Daniel looked pleased. Cici was quiet.

"Thanks for the help. This place takes a lot of work. I hope I last long enough to teach the boys the responsibilities that go along with it."

I nodded. Realizing that I was not only sweaty but reeked of animals, dung, and feed, I turned to Daniel a little sheepishly.

"I guess I should get back to the hotel. I am not fit to be around people right now. I stink, and my clothes are filthy,"

He grinned again.

"I have some sweats that, I think, will fit you if you don't mind. You can use the bathroom in the guest room where you changed. Everything you need is there, if you don't mind borrowing some things. If not, I will get them for you. Why don't you go change, and we will meet in the den before dinner? You have about an hour."

I looked surprised but took the sweats he handed me. I headed across the pool to the bedroom and was soon standing in a hot shower. As I stood and let the hot water play over my muscles, I let my mind wander. Working the animals had used several sets of muscles that I didn't normally use. The hot water felt good, and I began to relax. My mind, however, was busy. I was trying to sort out what I was feeling. After several months of my own enforced solitude, it was nice to be back among people. I was trying to sort out how I felt when I heard a rap on the bathroom door. Then Cici's voice broke my train of thought.

"Dad sent over some deck shoes. He thought they might be more comfortable than those hiking boots you were wearing."

I stuttered my thanks and told Cici to just put them on the bed. I stood in the shower. Just the knowledge that she was outside that door had given me a raging hardon. I turned the water to all cold and stood there until I was shivering. To my own disgust, the cold water didn't make a dent in my engorged cock. It just stood there, proud and throbbing.

I finally managed to get out of the shower, dry off, and get into the sweats. I was commando since Daniel hadn't provided any underwear and I couldn't stand to put on the pair of boxers I had worn all day. Taking a deep breath, I headed out across the pool. In the den, I found Daniel opening the bottle of scotch I had brought. He put two ice cubes in each glass with two fingers of scotch. I noticed that fingers measured the distance between his index finger and his little finger. He held his glass up and we touched the rims. Daniel looked at me and spoke softly.

"Here's to the heroes, those that are unknown, those that we remember, and those that do the remembering."

I nodded and sipped the scotch. We stood silently for a few minutes. I saw Daniel glance over my shoulder, and I turned. Cici was standing in the door. I gasped. Her hair was done, falling in graceful waves over her shoulders and around her face. She was wearing minimal makeup, but she didn't need much. She wore a sundress covered with sunflowers on a white background. A pair of white sandals finished off her shapely legs. I must have gasped because she smiled, dropped a light curtsy.

"I take it, you approve?"

I stammered again. You know my eloquent side.

"Ugh... Yeah!"

She came in and made herself a scotch. Daniel motioned to the couch and settled into his recliner. I sat down at the end of the couch closest to him, expecting Cici to take the chair on the other side of her dad. To my surprise, she sat down next to me, her thigh touching mine.

Daniel looked at me over the rim of his glass as he spoke.

"What are your plans?"

I sipped the scotch and considered. I really had only thought that I would head back to Texas when my attorney gave me the heads-up. He had done that and, as far as I had determined, there wasn't anything keeping me here. I told him that. He looked at me. I couldn't see Cici while I turned slightly to speak to Daniel.

Daniel looked at me and I saw the intensity of his eyes. I steeled myself for what I imagined being a rebuke. What I got was a complete surprise.

"If there isn't anything pressing back in Texas like some fish that desperately needs to be caught, why don't you check out of that hotel, grab your things and move in here for a few days. There is still a lot to see and learn here. Besides, the kids enjoy having you around, and it takes a load off me. Those little hellions are a workout and I appreciate the chance to recuperate.

That came as a complete surprise. I suppose I looked a lot like those fish I pulled out of the gulf, wide-eyed, my mouth in an O shape and working desperately. I heard Cici giggle and looked at her before I looked back at Daniel. My brain had slipped into neutral and wasn't working at all. I finally managed to find a voice.

"I suppose I can do that."

Daniel grinned, and I felt arms encircle my neck as a face ground itself into my shoulder. I looked down to find Cici looking back at me with tears in her eyes. I had the sudden feeling that I had lost all control and was in the caboose of a train that was being engineered far out of my control.

"Great. Cici can follow you into town tomorrow, and you can check out of that hotel. Leave the rental car there and the company can pick it up."

What wasn't said but certainly understood was the fact that Cici and I would be together for most of the morning unchaperoned. The rest of the evening was pleasant. Dinner was some Mexican dish with which I wasn't familiar. It was spicy hot but flavorful and filling. Even the kids scarfed it up despite the chili and other seasonings.

We retired back to the den and Cici put on a Disney movie for the boys. We spent the evening watching the old version of Disney's Robinhood. I found it enjoyable as I watched the boys often sing along and dance with the animated characters. Cici again sat close to me and Daniel occupied his recliner. Consuela brought in huge bowls of popcorn, lightly seasoned with chili and cinnamon. I was skeptical at first but was soon inhaling that delicious confection by the handful.

When the movie was finished, Consuela took the boys and put them to bed. Both Cici and Daniel got up and went to see each of them, tucking them in securely, kissing their little foreheads, and telling them that they loved them. Cici had grabbed my hand and pulled me along for the evening ritual. I intended to hang back and watch, but Jason, the eldest, looked at me and smiled. He held up his arms and there was nothing to do but go and lean down for a hug. I heard that voice in my ear and nearly lost it right there.

"Thank you, Uncle Rick. This has been the best day ever. I love you."

Much the same thing happened in the other two rooms. By the time it was over, I was a total wreck. It had been years since I had experienced that kind of honest and free feeling. Cici led us back to the den. I noticed that Daniel was not with us. I looked around expectantly and Cici smiled.

"Dad has gone to bed. He said to tell you he would see you at breakfast."

Suddenly, I felt like I was trapped. This was all happening far too fast and was not at all what I expected. Cici sensed my sudden mood change. I was sitting on the couch, almost stiff. She sprung to sit up on her knees facing the back of the couch. She touched my arm lightly and looked at me almost in terror.

"Oh Rick. Please don't. I don't intend to scare you away. Dad has his own agenda. Please. Just relax. You don't have to do anything you don't want. I am not expecting anything. I don't know what Dad is thinking, though I could take a good guess. But I don't have any ulterior motives. If you want me to move to the other chair, I will. If you just want to be alone, that is fine. But you have to know that I haven't seen anyone else, been with anyone else, or thought about anyone else but you since that last time I saw you before you left.

I have made up my mind that If I have to be a single mom the rest of my life, that is what I will be. I have no wish to take the risk of exposing myself to the kind of anguish I experienced with Trey Cardoza. You have been so burned by your experiences that you may never open that big kind heart of yours to that kind of betrayal again. I understand it. I don't blame you. If all you are for me is a brother to my Dad and a friend, then I can be happy with that."

I looked down at her. She was solemn, but her eyes were clear and unwavering as she looked back at me. I was as confused at that moment as I had ever been in my life. My emotions were running a muck and all the voices in my head were clamoring so that I couldn't make heads or tails of them. All I knew was that, right then and right there, I really didn't want to be anywhere else. I didn't speak. I just pulled her toward me and laid her across my lap, putting her head on my chest, and sitting in silence.

Eventually, I sat her up and looked at her, speaking softly.

"Cici, I need to get some sleep. Right now, I don't know which way to jump. There are so many emotions and thoughts in my head that it sounds more like a cacophony than sane thought."

She nodded and slipped back off the couch. Leaning down, she kissed me softly on the lips.

"I know. I hope I see you in the morning."

She turned and without another word padded out of the room and out of sight. I sat there for another 30 minutes, trying to decide if my legs would support me. I got back to my room, locked the sliding door, and then locked the door into the hallway. Without undressing, I flopped down on the bedspread and lay looking up at the dark ceiling. I guess at some point I fell asleep because when I opened my eyes again, it was daylight. I got up, wiped my face with a washrag and cold water, rinsed out my morning mouth, peed and opened the sliding door.

Across the pool, the entire family was gathered. Consuela was dishing out helpings of eggs, sausages, and hash browns. Cici was helping the boys with their plates. She was dressed in a pair of old faded jeans and a US Army t-shirt. Daniel was drinking coffee and watching the boys. I stood unobserved for several minutes, just watching them. Finally, Daniel caught sight of me and waved. I stepped off around the pool to join breakfast.

After breakfast, Consuela hustled the boys off to play. Daniel made some excuse about having to take care of some urgent business and disappeared as well. Cici looked at me expectantly. I had a mouthful of toast.

"Well. Are you going to stay?"

I nodded, still trying to get rid of the half chewed toast. I finally mumbled through my dry mouth.

"Yes. I'm staying. Can you follow me to the hotel, so I can check out, leave the car, and get my things? I need to stop at Walmart and pick up some things as well, if you don't mind."

She grinned and seemed to bounce in the chair.

"Of course I can. Is there anything else you need to do?"

"Not that I can think of."

"Good. Let's go."

I still had the baggy sweats Daniel had provided. Not very stylish and not at all what I would have preferred. It didn't seem to phase Cici. She went to speak with Consuela and came back with her purse. She was grinning like the Cheshire cat as we headed out. I climbed into my rental car, and she got into a nearly new BMW SUV, one of the by-products of her divorce. She followed close behind me.

At the hotel, I went upstairs to get my gear. Cici went with me and stood close to me in the elevator and held my hand as we entered my room. It only took a few minutes for me to gather my meager kit. She stood out of the way, watching. At one point, I looked at her in the mirror and saw her eyes moving between me and the king-sized bed. I hurried my packing and gathered her as well, pulling the door closed behind me.

I paid the bill and made arrangements for the hotel to return the rental car. Back in the SUV, Cici hesitated at the back of the car as I tossed my duffle bag and laptop into the rear hatch. As I pulled the hatch down, she offered the keys to me. I paused, looked at her, and took the keys. I opened the passenger side door as she slipped in. Sliding into the driver's seat, I immediately found myself with my knees bunched up against the dashboard, my head rubbing the headliner and the steering wheel rubbing my chest and under my chin. Cici giggled as I fumbled for the seat controls to allow me to stretch out my legs and be able to drive the car.

The next stop at Walmart. I was strange. We got a basket and walked side by side around the store. Cici needed to pick up some groceries and other odds and ends. I needed a few more sets of clothing and some sundry items. It occurred to me that we were more like a married couple out doing our routine shopping than whatever else we were.

It was nearly noon when we arrived back at the country house. Daniel was nowhere to be seen. Consuela was getting lunch ready as we unloaded our parcels and my luggage. I took my stuff to the bedroom as Consuela and Cici unloaded the groceries. When I got back to the kitchen, sandwiches were on the counter, with chips and sodas. Consuela beamed.

"Help yourself."

I did. I took a plate to the pool and sat down. I was still a little curious about Daniel and his absence. Cici came out with a plate and a soda. She sat down next to me.

"I thought we might take the boys to the carnival this evening. It's just down the road in the next town."

I was surprised, but found that it did sound like fun. Since Daniel had put in his disappearing act, I went to help Cici tend to the livestock. To my surprise, a Hispanic man was in the barn. I met Pepe, Consuela's husband. He helped around the place and did most of the work. Cici and I pitched in. It was hard work, but pleasant, and I found I liked being around the animals. We went back to the house to shower, dress, and get ready to go to the carnival.

Cici drove. We found the small carnival set up in the town square. There were rides, some sideshows, a few carnival games, and, of course, a plethora of junk foods to enjoy. It was almost 10 pm when we finally had enough. I carried Robert, the middle boy, and Cici carried Devin, the youngest. Jason walked holding my hand, occasionally staggering, he was so tired. We piled them in the child seats and then climbed in, exhausted ourselves.

Back at the house, Consuela was waiting up. Pepe was there to help, and it was no time at all before the three boys were snug in bed. Cici and I found Daniel in his recliner. We each got a beer and flopped down on the couch. As you might expect, Cici downed half her beer in one gulp and then belched contentedly. I looked at her in shock. She giggled.

"What's wrong?"

"That wasn't exactly what I expected from a polite young lady."

She looked at me. I saw her swallow again and then emit an even longer and louder belch. She looked at me intently.

"Are your sensibilities properly astounded?"

I looked at her, chugged the rest of my beer, and then recited the ABC's in one prolonged belch. Her response was to laugh so hard I thought she was going to fall off the couch. Daniel just looked at us.

"Christ, it sounds like the enlisted men's club at Fort Leonard Wood."

That got another round of laughter. Daniel had Rio Lobo, the John Wayne movie, on the TV. We all sat and watched until the end of the movie. Daniel got up and announced he was headed for bed. As he left, he turned off the overhead lights, leaving the room only illuminated by the ending credits of the movie. I felt her move.

"You want another beer?"

"Sure."

She disappeared and came back with two more beers. She also brought an extra two and put them on the table. I raised an eyebrow. She smiled.

"Trying to be a good Boy Scout. Always prepared."

I looked at her.

"You aren't going to fool anyone about being a Boy Scout."

She grinned and curled up next to me on the couch.

"Thank you for going with me and the boys to the carnival. Jason was really impressed when you won that big stuffed bear at the shooting gallery."

"I wish I had been more successful with that ring toss. I think the guy finally gave in after I spent 50 bucks on a $2 stuffed rabbit."

Cici giggled.

"Yeah, but Robert was impressed. He was clutching that rabbit all the way home, and I couldn't get it away from him when he went to bed."

"I'm glad they had a good time. I did too."

"Really. You didn't get bored?"

"Not at all. I haven't done anything like that for 20 years."

We sat in silence for a while longer. Cici reached over to the recliner and got the remote control. She flipped through some selections and I saw the credits come up and heard the title music. I recognized the movie. It was another John Wayne flick and one of my very favorites. I watched as the titles were unveiled to show "The Quiet Man" with John Wayne and Maureen O'Hara. Cici and I sat, snuggled together.