All Comments on 'My Sister is a Tease'

"Tell me you're my sister slut," I say to her.

"Oh yes, I'm your sister slut!" she calls out to me.......

Nobody talks like this.

Nice quick dirty little piece. I admire anyone who can do this challenge. I can't introduce myself in 750 words let alone write a story. Common set up, but delivered in a cliff notes version that takes away the conflict a lot of I/T readers enjoy, but makes for a nice just go for it fantasy.

One very minor nitpick. Not sure how a woman can be slender and curvy, but that's the only thing that stood out to me only because it messed with the instant visual you were establishing.

Good job 5 stars

Nice compact story. But mom and dad had just left for work so they have 8 hours to fool around before worrying about them coming home.

Highly erotic in only 750 words! What do they do next? First, big brother asks if she's on birth control of some kind, and then they discuss the attraction of incest, and its moral implications, if they're inclined that way. Third, they swear never to tell a soul. Finally, Kate offers to set him up with some other nice girls she knows, and he asks if she'd like to "go out" with some of his college friends. However, all that would require a lot more words! Very well done, not that I'm surprised. 5* ~~JBE

Very few 750 word stories have the time to build up any sexual tension, let alone build to a crescendo. This one somehow manages both. Well done.

I have to comment on the comment I got that "Nobody talks like this." It's true! Not in real life. But in the SimonDoom universe, people say and do all kinds of things I want them to, and I have fun with that, and enough readers do too that I keep having my characters act and talk this way.

But I respect Anon's right to roll his/her eyes and comment if that's his/her reaction.

Well done in the ALMOST impossible 750 Challenge.

Now for the real challenge: How many sequels might you offer ?

Mom used to tease me by putting on a show for me while leaving her bedroom door open so I could spy on her from the bathroom. The day I turned 18 is the day I walked into her room in the middle of her show. Life was never the same for us after that.

nicely done man! Trying to write any story is challenging enough...getting it to 750 words much harder

pity you chose to enter this contest with this offering. So much potential and you had to rush it like a teenager anxious to bust his cherry. Come back to this story at a later take and take it to the limit. Great effort though.

I gave you a 4/5. You lost a point because of a simple continuity error:

-

"Kate." I shake my head, exasperated. "Look at you. Wearing a crop top and no bra, and those little shorts. In front of your big brother. Bet you're not wearing panties, are you?"

- and then a few paragraphs later...

It's time to get her naked. I pull the shorts down her legs and shuck the bra top over her shoulders. My little sister stands in front of me, nude, holding nothing back.

=========

You got screwed over by a bra.

How does the 'anonymous' commenter KNOW "nobody talks like this!"?? I think MAYBE THEY DO!D

Such a nasty story...well done in 750 words, leaves SO MUCH open for sequel(s)...hope to see something in the future...sooner than later!

750 words...🔥 Well done 5 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟

Nice. Concise. Hot! 750 words is just one breath - almost. Your story was...excellent. So, it it had a couple of hiccups...nothing to die for! One noted the off/on bra hiccup; my hiccup was a grammar point. But no lost points for this one: "Our parents already have left the house for work." The action had passed already so it should be: "Our parents already had left the house for work." [I've been working with an editor; so, I just happened to see that!] ;-)

And, just my $0.02 - No sequel required - I like to keep the image just the way you painted it! Open to a fertile mind.

Every guy’s dream if he has a hot sister.

Hawt, Hawt, Hawt!

11/10 Shorty Shorts!!!!!

Too short for 5 stars, but for the 750-word limit.

Well done!

It's funny how this story makes me think back about my sister. I was three years old then her, and she never teased me, but she was so damn beautiful with her long blonde hair, big blue eyes with a great body. I had always thought about what a great fuck she'd be. That was some 52 years ago, I've been married twice, and I've divorced twice seen. While she still married to the same great husband for the last 50 years now. But at 70 years of age, every time I see her to this day, I still think about what a great a fuck she would have still been. Well maybe in my dreams again sometime..